Gissa Job

(Out of Office on!) 

It’s pushing 10 weeks since my last blog update following our return from Corfu. As we’ve had another short holiday in the mean time I thought it about time I bored you with more snaps from our travels.

Before we get on to the fun bits I need to update you on the old cancer issues, after all that is how this Blog started back in December 2015. I’ve had some large lumps under my chin for a while which won’t drain with lymphoma massages. The nurse at the Sue Ryder Home was getting concerned so referred me back to the Royal Berks where the wonderful care I’ve had kicked back into gear. Within two weeks I’d had another MRI Scan, not as scary as I’d remembered the original one from last year, even with the scan having to be stopped half way through due to a power cut. The results were a bit non-committal, so a further ultrasound scan was arranged, again all in short order. It was then a case of waiting a week to get the results. All through this latest set of procedures I felt a bit like a fraud. I feel well enough, I’m at probably my heaviest weight due to CNS Jo telling me back in 2016 to eat as much as I could, and to eat high fat foods, she never told me to stop, so I blame her entirely. I’m probably at my fittest for a number of years due to exercising Neville twice a day. I mentioned this to my Consultant and CNS when I got my results. Firstly, everything is fine. I’ve got chronic lymphoma which I’ll have to manage for the rest of my life, but I haven’t got cancer again J Secondly, both Mr Cool Dude and Amy (CNS) confirmed that I wasn’t a fraud, and I didn’t waste anyone’s time. With my history of being pretty crap at getting better they’d always rather err on the side of caution. “See you in November, if you’ve ANY concerns then get in touch” were the parting words from Amy.

I’ve had one more visit to the hospital since the last update as my valve had begun to leak. I was due to see my usual Speech and Language Therapist, Caroline, but she was off sick. However I was told one of the Consultants “would have a go” (I kid you not). I showed up for my 2.30pm appointment to be told there was a mix up and I’d be seen at 3.30pm. No real problem as a good friend was also in clinic that day so we chatted about our various ailments until I was eventually called in. It was here that things started to unravel a bit, but in a quite amusing way. The Dr. who was going to change my valve was new to me, and it seemed like she wasn’t overly ofay with the procedure. Once the leaking valve is taken out we need to put in a puncture dilator to stop the hole from contracting. She was rushing hither and tither trying to find a dilator when I had one in my pocket as I always carry it in case of emergency. She eventually realised that me saying “Use this one” was probably a good idea. The next problem was what size valve did I usually have? Well, call me old fashioned, but I’d rather hoped that my medical notes would supply that answer. No such luck, so we had a bit of an experiment with a size 8 valve which just wouldn’t slip into the hole, before looking at the valve which had been taken out and trying a size 10 valve, which went in like a slippery oyster. It was only when I got home that I noticed the valve is sliding up and down unlike any valve I’ve had in the past. It’s also white whereas my other valves have been black. To cut a long story short, the wrong valve has been fitted, but it isn’t leaking so no major damage done and it’ll be replaced in the next week or so when a new one arrives from its European maker. This might sound like a moan but it isn’t. Despite staff sickness, my valve was replaced, it stopped the leak and I was able to drink and eat normally. And I like to think that I was a good guinea pig for the Dr. to practise her technique on. As an aside I’ve been advised that my valve is a 20 French 6mm, nope no idea what that means either. The main challenge may be that having a 10mm valve in will have expanded the hole in my throat that could mean I’ll have to be valve-less for a while whilst it contracts. All good fun.

Regular readers may remember that earlier this year I was on the Victoria Derbyshire show on BBC2 discussing my concerns regarding the possibility of shortages of my meds following a potential No Deal Brexit. With that possibility becoming more and more of a reality I was invited back onto the show to express my concerns. This time, instead of being filmed at the BBC studios, it was at College Green, opposite the Houses of Parliament. To be totally honest, I was way out of my depth. On one side I had the Dr. turned whistle blower of Operation Yellowhammer (The Govts. Plan to get medical supplies into the country). Dr. David Nichols. The other guests were a Left Wing activist who reminded me of a young Ben Elton, and a Conservative MP, Martin Vickers. Mr Left Wing Activist kept butting in, valid points, but could have shut up and let me have my say too. The MP was a disgrace, and even laughed at one point when we were discussing people who may die if they don’t get their meds. The Dr. was professional as you’d expect and Victoria was delightful. She met me before the show went live, chatted about how I was getting on and set my nerves at ease. I left feeling quite frustrated as I wasn’t able to get across a number of points I’d wished to. Once I was home I watched the recording on iPlayer and was shocked at just how poor my voice sounded. The combination of being outside and the muppets on both sides of the argument who kept chanting in the background made it very hard to understand what I was saying. My career as a media lovey is well and truly over, however I’m still available for Panto appearances, my preference would be one of the Ugly Sisters so that I don’t need to wear too much makeup. 

September is always an exciting month in the Clark household, it’s the start of the rugby season, the 17^th we’ve been involved in with Rams RFC! In those 17 seasons I’ve been a dad, a coach, a team manager, the mini manager, junior section manager, youth fixtures secretary, 1^st XV touch judge, and photographer. This season I’ve added a new title to the collection and become the manager of the Rams Sirens side. I must have been incredibly drunk when I agreed to that one. At the time of writing they’ve played two matches, winning one narrowly and losing one narrowly. They are a great bunch of ladies, and if anyone fancied trying out, we train on a Wednesday evening at 7.30pm………….. 

The Rams have started their first ever season in National 1 in dramatic style. Winning their first four matches leaves them in second place in the league, real nosebleed time. That doesn’t really tell the whole story as all four matches have gone down right to the wire. At this rate no one at OBR will have any finger nails or hair left by the end of the season. It’s a great introduction to a high level of rugby. Crowds are up, media coverage is great and the whole club is pulling together. The starting 15 so far this season has been made up of 14 players from last season and one player who was also playing at National 2 Level, so any claims that Rams have bought their success can be kicked well into touch. There is a true family (#Ramily) vibe to the club these days. The Mini's love coming down to watch their heroes on the pitch, and those heroes love the support they're getting. Club House Corner is becoming similar, if not better than Redruth's Hellfire Corner. 

I’m proud to be one of the shirt sponsors for the Mighty Cents, the Rams III’s. Max had his first introduction to adult rugby with the Cents and enjoyed two seasons before disappearing off to University. The team have the ethos of welcoming in new players and showing them how the game should be played, on and off the pitch. I’ve managed to watch one of their matches so far this season, and they’re looking good. I like to think the new kit helps J

We were lucky enough to have a week down in Cornwall in the third week of September. It’s not often you have to leave the beer garden to go inside the pub due to it being too hot at this time of year, but we were blessed with wall to wall sunshine. A week of walking on the beaches and headlands, lazy pub lunches, more beach walks, cosy dinners and early nights were just what we both needed. We managed to meet up with the one and only Sidney Thompson whilst we were away, Sidney is Neville’s half brother by another mother. Half an hour running around the beach, where Neville perfected his Oscar nomination for “Best Dead Dog” impersonation.

This was then followed by 40 minutes in a pub where the pups proceeded to charm all around them whilst they licked each other’s noses.

 It was Sidney who introduced us to the Kromi breed about five years ago, through our mutual love of the Porthcothan area of Cornwall. (I’ll admit to thinking he was a Jack Russell to start with, but he forgave me after I submitted the 500 lines of “Kromis aren’t Jack Russell’s!”) It was Sidney who let us know when Snuff (Nev’s mum) was having a litter and put us in contact with Jo. After dithering about saying yes, then no, then yes again (us, not Jo) we finally became Nev’s assistant. It’s his 2^nd Birthday today…….. a long walk in the woods with his new bestie Remy, follows by cakes, jelly and lashings of ginger beer all round! 

The last time we were down in Cornwall in March I’d booked a guided photography tour with the very talented Kate Whiston. Landscape photography had never been my forte, but three hours walking with Kate revived my interest in the genre. When I posted on FB that we were back down to Cornwall Kate messaged me to invite me on a walk from Trevose Head to the Lifeboat station to shoot the weekly practise launch from an angle not often seen. It was a great evening, albeit a tad chilly (I’m wearing shorts until October 1^st unless I need to wear a suit for work). I was really pleased with the results of the shoot, albeit I should perhaps have pulled out a bit at the launch to get the station in the shots as well as the boat. 

Cornwall in September, when the weather is good takes a lot of beating. Blue skies, blue seas, empty beaches, pubs serving great food. 

If you could guarantee the weather why would you go abroad? The pub lunches were spent at the Cornish Arms, one of Rick Steins places. We’d eaten there before and been impressed by the food, but not always by the service. This time both the food and service lived up to the expectations. The waiting staff and generally young folk and I guess are on a learning curve in the Stein empire. Two young ladies stood out for us. One was really interested in Neville as she’d never heard of a Kromis. The other introduced herself by say “Sorry, I’ve got a sore throat, so my voice isn’t great…………..” I replied “You think your voice is bad?” She laughed, which was exactly the response I’d hoped for. We didn’t go for three course meals at lunch time, just a pair of starters each with a glass of wine. Mackerel fillets, mussels, devilled kidneys, perfect for a lunch time snack. 

Evenings were spent on the beaches and back to the caravan for dinner, the fresh air meant we were pretty knackered and didn’t fancy eating out, other than the ritual trip to St Petoc’s Bistro for wonderful seafood.

One of the things that by now I should have down to a fine art is packing enough of the daily medical supplies I need to keep myself going whilst we’re away. When we fly abroad I pack two identical toilet bags with double the amount of base plates, filters, wipes etc that I need in each bag. One goes into hand luggage, the other into hold luggage, that way if the hold luggage gets lost I’ve still got enough supplies. Before traveling down to Cornwall I packed up one of the toilet bags with plenty of supplies to cover the five days. It was only when I needed to change a base plate on the Monday that I opened up the toilet bag to find I’d packed the wrong one. No base plates, no filters, no wipes, nothing of any use at all apart from a torch and a mirror. At this point I was contemplating a 10 hour round trip back home to pick up supplies to get me through the week. However, luckily I’d packed my travel camera bag which had a couple of base plates in it and a few filters, and then I remembered the bag I keep in the car which also had a couple of base plates in it. So long as I didn’t have any problems I’d have enough to get me through the week. Carol has now insisted that she’s going to check all my packing before we go away again as it turns out I’m a bit of an idiot.

When I was originally given the Cancer diagnosis way back in December 2015 I was worried about how my employers, Santander UK, would react. Throughout all the rubbish I’ve been through the past 4 years or so they have been nothing but supportive. I was made aware in the early days of Chemo and RT that a number of large companies operate a “Manage Out” policy to employees who have cancer. I have been so lucky to be working for a company who operate a “Lets support” policy. My immediate line manager and the team I work with have been understanding of my limitations, especially since I became a Lary. However, since June 2017 when my voice box was removed I have found it increasingly difficult to complete my job in a satisfactory manner. Communicating in a business or social manner is something I dread. I hate having to meet new people and to have to speak to them, be it face to face or over the phone. It is clear that I’m never going to improve on where I am at the moment, and that I’m really not fit for purpose as far as my job description is concerned. I was beginning to feel very depressed about the working week and the Sunday night dread crept back in. With that knowledge I’ve been in discussions with Santander to take a Settlement Offer. My final day with the company was today, I’m very grateful for the understanding I’ve been afforded. I’ll still need to do something to make a living, perhaps working on the fish counter at Waitrose for four hours a day (Not including weekends when I’ll be watching the Rams!). Maybe Carol and I will do a world tour of the UK in a camper van, copying Peter and Jane. Maybe I’ll write another book, or even finish the one that’s been in draft for two years. Maybe I’ll take my photography more seriously and try and earn some £’s. Maybe we’ll win the lottery and buy that house on the cliffs at Porthcothan. Maybe we’ll retire disgracefully and embarrass the children……………………… So, as the title of this blog says………….. Gissa Job.

As always, thanks for reading.

To be continued…………….

#Shoulder2Shoulder