That Difficult Second Album……

There’s an old saying about bands having to record a follow up to a successful debut album “That Difficult Second Album”. We I’m afraid I’m suffering from that syndrome with what I was hoping would be the follow up book to #Shoulder2Shoulder. Diary of a Rugby Dad is still hovering around the 10,000 word mark, with a target of 150,000 to completion. Any hope I had of getting it published this coming summer are now well and truly dashed. I just can’t seem to find the energy or enthusiasm to get on with it at the moment. It’s a bit of a shame really as the final “Real Time” chapter of the book was completed last Saturday with the final league match for the Rams Centaurs AKA – The Mighty Cents. This is the team that’s embraced Max so well this season in his first year as an adult rugby player. They’re made up of a great bunch of lads who enjoy their rugby and play at a decent standard, ably backed up by SJ, Bernie and Rob. A fourth place finish in the Berks, Bucks and Oxford Division 1 was just rewards for a successful season. I get the feeling Max is looking forward to the 7s season starting once he’s got his exams out of the way.

Prior to being ill last year I’d followed the Rams 1^st Team, home and away, for about 5 seasons. The treatment I endured means that long away trips on a Saturday are still not a great idea. In September of last year I was a bit concerned where my “Rugby Fix” would be coming from when the 1’s were away from OBR. Well I needn’t have worried, watching the Mighty Cents playing with smiles on their faces has been a wonderful experience for the most part. We’ll gloss over the dicking at Amersham and Chiltern on one of the coldest days of the year! It appears the team quite like me watching their matches too, as I’m known affectionately (I hope) as “Profile Picture Paul” on the basis that I’m likely to have my camera with me whilst they’re playing. I think at one point earlier in the season around half the team were using my shots as their profile pics on Facebook.

Last Sunday was spent back up at OBR for the Roger Batchelor Mini’s Festival. Roughly 750 kids, aged from 6 to 12 arrived at the ground for the highlight of the Mini season. We were blessed by the best weather I’ve seen in my 13 years of attending the day. If anything is was perhaps a bit too hot. I’d imagine a number of players, parents and coaches played the “Ouchy, ouchy, ouchy” game in the shower that night. I was sensible and covered myself in Factor 50. As I knew I’d be seeing Scary or one of her minions this week there was no way I was going to get burnt and risk her wrath. 900 shots taken on the day, 100 uploaded to the Rams FB page and over 6,000 hits to date.

It was whilst at the festival that reality began to kick in. I was sitting on the balcony having a chat with Roger Batchelor when it was obvious that he couldn’t hear me clearly. My voice is just getting weaker and weaker, and over the last few weeks it has become increasingly painful, especially at night. During the day it was becoming painfully blatant that whoever I’m talking to can’t hear me, it’s upsetting and embarrassing. Over the last few weeks I’ve avoided using the phone at work, I’ve avoided interacting with people vocally, I’ve noticed I’m clutching my neck when I’m talking. This is all becoming a pile of pooh! Wednesday whilst working I had no choice but to make three external customer phone calls. None of them lasted much more than 30 minutes each, but by the time I’d finished I’m afraid I was an almost silent croak.

So it was with a degree of trepidation that I rocked up to RBH on Thursday for my scheduled follow up appointment. The ENT Dept. was rammed when I arrived, but despite my fears I was seen fairly quickly by Mr More Scary than Scary. After my initial reticence with his manner, I’ve now warmed to him. He did the usual “Up the nose and down the throat” procedure, which is still as unpleasant now as it was the first time it was done in December 2015. Blimey nearly 18 months ago, doesn’t time fly. He’s concerned that my voice is shagged out and that I’m having trouble swallowing again. The scope didn’t show up any new nasties but he’s set in motion a further PET Scan over in Oxford for a couple of weeks’ time, and then on 16^th May I’ll be undergoing yet another general anaesthetic so they can have a dig around at the tumour area to see what the heck is going on under the scar tissue. The operation is set for the day after Carol and I come back from a holiday in the Canaries, so again I’ll have to keep my neck out of the sun or suffer his wrath. We’re going back to the same resort we went to last September and to the same hotel. A bit of 5* luxury is just what’s needed at the moment.

Obviously this wasn’t really the news we were hoping for, but I’m not too concerned at the moment. There are a number of possible explanations for the current demise of my voice, the procedures prescribed will allow the guys to work out exactly what’s going on and to come up with the best course of treatment for whatever the problem is. That I’m seeing as a major positive, let’s find out what’s wrong and then fix it again.

So, the roundabout keeps turning.

As always, thanks for reading.

To be continued…………….

#Shoulder2Shoulder

We are the Champions….

They did it!!

The six #Shoulder2Shoulder runners (One was unable to start) completed the Half Marathon last weekend and raised a massive £2,100 between them, the JustGiving page is still open if you wanted to “Congratulate” them further, - https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/Paul-Clark43

I positioned myself near Prospect Park with the intention of taking photo’s as they came through, I managed to get shots of all the runners, bar young Ms Poole and Mrs Poole, which considering the amount of runners coming through I was quite pleased about. Stevie “Scuba” Bryant was the first #S2S runner home in a very respectable time of 1hr 42m.

It was quite emotional spotting all the different charity shirts coming through and quite warming to see the bright orange shirt wearers running for the RBH Official Charity. Next time I do anything like this I’ll make sure I don’t choose white running vests, far too difficult to spot in the crowds.

It would be impossible to personally thank everyone who contributed to our cause, so if you’re reading this now, then thank you so much.

Steve P. has come up with the bright idea that next year it would be good if he was in charge of the camera, and I was one of the runners and had kindly (?) offered to train / mentor / pick me up off the floor, in preparation. We’ll see, I’d love to do it, but I fear my knees may be just too far shot to manage it.

This week has been pretty “Full on” as far as work is concerned, probably the busiest since I went back in May of last year, to be honest I’m totally knackered this evening, so recovery would appear to be still ongoing, oh great! On Thursday I had to go to my old stomping ground of Harrow, I’d forgotten what a crap place it is to drive to and what a dump it is when you arrive. A quick Facebook update describing Harrow as a dump didn’t seem to go down too well with the Harrow Town Centre Facebook page –

Paul Clark checked in to Harrow Town Centre.

Yesterday at 11:43 · Harrow · 

Long time since I've been here, it's still a dump.

Review

Harrow Town Centre

Region · Harrow

156 people checked in here

Top of Form

LikeShow More Reactions

Comments

Harrow Town Centre We're really sorry to hear you feel this way.

Unlike · Reply · 3 · Yesterday at 12:08

Bottom of Form

Carol advised me as she was leaving for work this morning that she’d be going for a “Quick Pint” after work and Errant Son is working until 8pm tonight I thought I’d make a simple and delicious Lasagne for their enjoyment when they eventually stoat back home, then it clicked that I hadn’t done a Clark recipe for a while, so here goes.

My Version of a Classic Lasagne –

Ingredients

Ragu

750g Lean beef mince.

Tin of chopped tomatoes

Stick of celery (chopped into small pieces)

One carrot (chopped into small pieces)

One onion (chopped into small pieces)

Two cloves of garlic (roughly chopped)

Mushrooms (roughly chopped)

Thumb sized piece of Chorizo (chopped into small pieces)

Very large glass of red wine

Mozzarella ball

Sprigs of thyme

Massive amount of grated parmesan

Cheese Sauce

30g flour

30g butter

80g cheddar cheese

500ml milk

Start by heating a large pan on a high heat with a slug of olive oil and chuck in the chorizo, fry until the oils from the chorizo are released into the pan. Log in the mince and stir with a whisk (this helps to break down the meat) until the meat is browned all over. Next add the red wine and let it cook down until all the liquid has gone. Add the onions, garlic, celery and carrot and cook for about 5 minutes. Add in the tomatoes plus a tin of water and the mushrooms turn the heat down low and bubble for 20 minutes or so, then add another tin of water – repeat for 1hr 20min. Whilst waiting for the ragu to cook sit down at the computer and write a blog to take up the time, whilst slugging the remainder of the opened wine bottle. When it’s finally ready, run out to the garden and rescue the stupid cat who’s decided to attack the massive Bengal cat from next door. Placate the cat with “Dreamies” and allow the ragu to cool after stirring in the thyme.

To make the cheese sauce chuck the butter into a saucepan on a medium heat to melt, then add the flour and cook for about 5 minutes, take off the heat and slowly add in the milk stirring all the time, put back on the heat and cook gently for 10 minutes, stirring often. Finally add the grated cheddar, salt, pepper and a touch of nutmeg. Continue stirring until the cheese is all melted.

To assemble (Ha, ha, how pretentious!) the dish line a large dish with a layer of ragu, cover with a layer of lasagne sheets, add another layer of ragu with some of the cheese sauce, parmesan and mozzarella. Repeat until the dish is crammed to the top. Finally add a few dots of ragu to the top of the dish and cover with the remaining parmesan.

To cook, cover the dish with baking foil and whack into the middle shelf of a preheated oven (180 degrees) for about 30 minutes. After 30 mins remove the baking foil and cook for another 10 minutes to brown the top.

When your family eventually return, serve with garlic bread and a decent bottle of red. Never, never, ever serve it with salad, otherwise Nino will visit you in the wee small hours with a spiky stick!

As always, thanks for reading.

To be continued………………

#Shoulder2Shoulder

 “It’s a two bottle Wednesday”

RUN TO THE HILLS

Two days to go until the intrepid seven set off for the Reading Half Marathon, raising funds via #Shoulder2Shoulder for the Berkshire Cancer Centre. So, Steve, Kath, Olly, Zoe, Sophie, Ben and Stevie, enjoy the run and thank you so much for agreeing to support this cause, it means a huge amount to me. If you’d still like to donate the link is here >> https://www.justgiving.com/teams/Shoulder2Shoulder

I’ve no idea yet where I’m going to position myself to take shots, I doubt if I’ll be able to get into the MadStad for the finish, but I’ll be somewhere along the route snapping away in my rather smart #Shoulder2Shoulder polo shirt. (I decided I’d look a bit daft wearing a running vest!).

A couple of people have asked how the tattoo is getting on. Well it seems to have settled down in its new home, no scabbing, no bleeding and I quite like it, even if the current Mrs Clark hates it with a vengeance.

On Wednesday I received probably one of the worst messages you can get from your children. Luckily it wasn’t the “I’ve got my girlfriend pregnant” text, it was the “I’ve passed my driving test” one instead. Congratulations to Maxwell James George Clark, he’s the first in the immediate family to pass his test at the first time of asking. I made a comment on the Peter and Jane FB page  (https://www.facebook.com/peterandjaneandmummytoo/ ) about this momentous news and was amazed when the posting got over 500 “Likes”. However the comments left me divided. I suggested that the big problem with Max passing would be me paying the insurance, we did it for Anna and of course we’d be doing it for Max too. He’s still in education and the freedom his license will give him is a just reward for his hard work.

I was really surprised by the amount of comments I got that were basically “He’s old enough to drive, make him get his own insurance”. (I also got loads of great recommendations for Insurance Companies though) Now I’m not sure if we’re cosseting the kids, but my view is that either he or Anna would have struggled to fund insurance at their ages and surely part of being a parent is that you support your kids? Also, there’s now bugger all chance of me having to drive to any functions at the rugby club which involve beer and wine, no need for me to drag across town twice a week to take him to training, etc, etc, etc………

The shock of the news made it the first “Two Bottle Wednesday” for god knows how long, head was a tad sore on Thursday morning.

About three weeks ago I’d changed the car insurance on both Carol’s car and mine to Saga (Yes, we’re that old!) without thinking about Max taking his test. Well hardly surprising but Saga wouldn’t insure him. After messing about for a couple of hours I eventually settled on Admiral Multi Car, premiums without Max were only slightly higher than Saga, with him it was eye watering, but the debit card number was passed over, and from 27^th March he’ll be let free on the roads of Reading, you’ve been warned.

If you saw the Blog last week you’d have read about the sad passing of Lisa Magill. Lisa was laid to rest on Friday of this week, her family asked her worldwide friends to wear yellow in recognition of the Sarcoma charity which supported her through her long, difficult and brave fight against cancer. Tragically the only item of clothing I possess is this –

 but knowing Lisa’s sense of humour and her love for rock music I have a feeling she’d have approved. “Stay Fabulous Rock Stars”

That’s it for the week, please if you’ve any spare change then a JustGiving donation would be appreciated. Hopefully the weather will be kind to all the runners on Sunday. Saturday will be spent watching Max play for the Rams 5^th Team, suspect it might be a bit of a slower pace than I’ve been watching of late. Then back home to hopefully watch England gain the Grand Slam.

As always, thanks for reading.

To be continued………….

#Shoulder2Shoulder 

An Open Letter

Dear Cancer

I hope you don’t mind me writing to you like this, but I think after the last 15 months we’ve at least become acquaintances, even if we’ll never be friends. I’d obviously heard about you before we met, I’d heard you had a nasty reputation as a cruel dude, people said you were ruthless and said you were crude. They were correct! I’ll never forget our first meeting, after 52 years of avoiding you, you came round the corner and tried to punch me in the head, not a very pleasant thing to do, I’m sure you’ll agree.

A one to one fight with you was never going to be easy, but you made one simple mistake when you tried to take me on. You didn’t look to see who had my back. My family, old and new friends were all there fighting with me. Some of those friends are big and tough rugby players, others are “Butter wouldn’t melt” ladies, a few have been through what you throw at them and have come out the other side, but they had one thing in common, they were there for me. Ok, I’ll admit it, you got a couple of lucky low punches in during the first few rounds. Towards the end you managed to knock me down, but I still got up before the count of 10 and my family and friends never threw the towel in. That’s why you were never going to beat me this first time.

Now that isn’t to say that the poor buggers that you do beat don’t fight and don’t have amazing support, it’s just that sometimes you can be a real playground bully and you’ll hit people with sucker punches when they least expect it, that’s what bullies do, you’re not brave, you’re a coward. One day, probably not in my lifetime, but one day, someone bigger than you will come along and give you the beating you deserve. You’ll be banished from this earth along with all the other bullies modern medicine has managed to beat. You don’t care who you pick on, the good, the bad and the ugly, they’re all the same to you……. Targets to be eaten, lives to be changed, you don’t care.

This now brings me to the main point of this letter. You’ve beaten someone I’ve come to know and respect over the last six months or so. Lisa fought against you with all her heart, soul and strength, but you just wouldn’t leave her alone, you had to keep coming back for one more bite at her didn’t you? Just like the playground bully that you are. She was one of the bravest people I’ve had the fortune to come across, her writing inspired me to continue my blogs and finish my book. I was lucky enough to have three or four private conversations with her, she was frightened, annoyed and darn right pissed off with you, but her fighting spirit kept her going far longer than you had planned. She will be missed hugely by her close family and her worldwide family. But, and here’s where you’ve made another mistake Mr C. she’ll never be forgotten, and in her memory the fight to banish you will become even stronger. You see what happens each time you have a victory? It makes us stronger and more determined to see the back of you once and for all.

This is a very sad day, but now the Magill family know that Lisa is at peace and away from pain. It’s been heart breaking the past few weeks seeing Lisa and her family in so much pain.

You will not win!

Yours faithfully.

Cancer patients and their families. 

Look into my eyes………….

This is a bit of a mixed update for the week. Up’s, down’s and a bit of pain.

On Wednesday I was reading a blog posting on the MacMillan website from a chap who’d been through a very similar process to me at roughly the same time. He’s been in remission now since May of 2016, again just like me. It was an interesting and thought provoking piece of writing. He was questioning how he was no supposed to be feeling, how he was finding it difficult to get on with “Real Life”, how every ache and pain, cough and cold, made him question whether his cancer was making a reappearance. His friends and family had all been through the wringer with him whilst he was ill and being treated. They heard the words “Remission” and breathed that big shy of relief that it was all over and that things could get back to normal. He did his best to put on the “Normal” face. He went back to work, but struggled to concentrate on even the most menial of tasks. He found himself getting fatigued every day, whether he’d done any exercise or not. He found he became irritated with who he classed as fools far too easily. He became argumentative for no apparent reason. He didn’t want to go out and interact, he didn’t want to stay in and fester. He was 14 months in and still worried, anxious, frightened and was struggling to see any light at the end of the tunnel.

Now I’m not saying that the blog post was written by me, it wasn’t. But I can recognise almost every one of his concerns as something I’ve been through and to a degree I’m still going through in one way, shape or form.

I read the responses to his post and was incredibly relieved to see that the vast majority of replies were along the lines of “You’re not alone”, “That’s how I felt”, “It does get better”, “Talk to people”, “Talk to people”, “Talk to people”……………

Have a look into someone’s eyes, the eyes don’t lie.

 - And the man in the mirror has sad eyes.........

Folk might well be through the worst of the illness, but the road to recovery is long and dotted with pot holes that sometimes are hidden with water, it’s not until you hit them that you realise just how deep some of them can be.

The drawn out saga of my tattoo was completed, well almost, this week. I sat in the chair clenching my teeth as the first inking was made, and to be honest it was nowhere near as bad as I expected. A bit “Sharp” in places but not overly painful. What had been promised to be about half an hour turned into closer to an hour and a half, due to the fact that I’m a “Bleeder”, apparently. You learn something new every day. I’ve got to go back in a couple of weeks to get it finished fully, but it’s looking pretty good from what I’ve seen so far in the mirror.

The fund raising for the Half Marathon is going pretty well, we’re up to a combined total of just over £800 as we speak.. Next week I’ll be tapping up my work contacts and I hope they’re feeling in a generous mood. There’s still two to go before the event so if you haven’t donated yet, and would like to, here’s the link >> https://www.justgiving.com/teams/Shoulder2Shoulder        remember, every penny raised is going straight to the Berkshire Cancer Centre. Hopefully next week we’ll have got over the £1k mark.

A weekend of daughter home from Uni, dinner at Nino’s and a bit of rugby thrown in to look forward to.

As always, thanks for reading.

To be continued…………….

#Shoulder2Shoulder 

Just Giving Update

With just over 3 weeks to go until the Reading Half Marathon we’re currently standing at just over £500 raised on the Runners ‘n Writers Just Giving page - 

https://www.justgiving.com/teams/Shoulder2Shoulder this isn’t at all shabby considering we’ve only been going for about 10 days, and I for one haven’t twisted any arms yet via work contacts, their turn will come. If you’d like to donate then it’s just a click away on the above link. “Don’t go to the pub tonight, stay in and give me you f*****g money” to misquote the great Sir Bob.

The running vests are ordered, I resisted the temptation to go for a shocking pink colour as I thought Stevie would just look too good in it, so plain white it is. I was lucky enough to win the 300 Club draw from Redingensians this week, so that’s the shirts paid for, the balance will be donated to the cause. I’m also really grateful to Gary Reynolds for allowing us to use the Rams logo on the shirts.

I’ve never actually watched the Half Marathon before, it’s usually coincided with Max playing on a Sunday. So, this year I’m really looking forward to seeing the #Shoulder2Shoulder team running and will try to get some good shots of them during the run and at the end too. According to a chap I’ve been chatting to, who’s also running for Berkshire Cancer Centre the plan is to meet up in the Butler for a pint or twelve afterwards, oh very well, if you insist.

I actually feel quite humbled and a tad guilty that these seven people have agreed to run for the BCC, but also incredibly proud, a case of real mixed emotions.

A quick update on the tattoo issue……. I visited a parlour this week to get some basic info, such as how much will it cost? How long will it take? And most importantly, how much will it hurt? The bloke I spoke to was great. I explained the reasoning behind the desire to be inked and he reckons than if I can undergo radiotherapy and all the injections involved in that process, then it’ll be a walk in the park. I’m hoping to make the booking for some time next week.

Finally for today, it’s a year ago today that I finished my final RT session out of the 30, it seems like a life time ago. Hopefully this weekend won’t follow on the same tracks of being admitted to Hunter Ward and hitting the lowest of low ebbs. Mind you, as I plan to go to OBR and watch the Dragons Teeth and Horde play you never know what could happen.

As always, thanks for reading.

Dig deep into those pockets………………..

To be continued………….

#Shoulder2Shoulder

Runners and Writers

https://www.justgiving.com/teams/Shoulder2Shoulder

It’s been a while since my last update, probably the longest gap since I started writing this blog. In truth not a lot has happened. My voice is still shagged, but I don’t feel ill. I’m still pretty tired, but I don’t feel ill. My weight is still too low, but I don’t feel ill. Guess I must be ok then.

Anyone who’s read this blog in the past will know I’ve been trying to raise funds for my treatment via the hashtag #Shoulder2Shoulder. The book raised about £1,000 which wasn’t too bad, but as my treatment is currently running at something like £15,000 and counting I’m a long way short of paying my way. This is where the influence of Redingensians Rams comes to the rescues yet again. A fair few of you will know Steve Poole. He’s the current groundsman at the club and an all-round solid chap! If he says that the pitches aren’t playable then he’s right, 100% of the time. He wants to see the kids playing rugby, but knows too well when the damage they’d do would be catastrophic. He’s also slightly unhinged, in the nicest possible way. In September he decided to take a holiday and cycle from John O’Groats to Land’s End, as you do! It was whilst he was on his one and only rest day on the ride that he sat down and read #Shoulder2Shoulder. The next day he called me up, “Paul, we can raise a load of money on the back of this, lets meet up when I’m back.”

Well, a while later we met up and discussed the possibilities of fundraising specifically for the Berkshire Cancer Centre. Steve, along with six others had entered the Reading Half Marathon in March 2017, they weren’t running to raise funds, until now……….

So, on 19^th March Steve, Kath, Olly and Zoe Poole, along with Sophie Courtier, Ben Alderon and the one and only Stevie “Scuba” Bryant will stand on the starting line, wearing #Shoulder2Shoulder running vests and will set off raising money for a charity so close to my heart over the last 14 months or so. To say I’m overwhelmed by this act of selfless kindness is an understatement. But, this is just the beginning. Steve is someone who’s total enthusiasm has to be seen to be believed. Over the next year we’ve agreed that Steve and I will work at raising as much funds as possible. Steve’s skills as a coach, motivator, inspiration and general scary bloke will be used to encourage others from the rugby club and wider community to get out and do something for the good of others, the other 1 in 2 who will suffer directly or indirectly from cancer during their lives. I’ll be the bloke banging away on Social Media promoting the events, I’ll also be the photographer as I think doing an Iron Man may well kill me before cancer does!

We’ve set up a Just Giving team page to help us in this process. It’s called “Team #Shoulder2Shoulder” and the link is here - https://www.justgiving.com/teams/Shoulder2Shoulder any funds you can spare would be really appreciated, any shares would also go down well. The target of £15,000 is what’s called a “Stretched Target”, but you may as well aim high.

As always, thanks for reading.

To be continued………………. Now there’s a bloody good reason!

#Shoulder2Shoulder.  

Look after yourself, you only get one go at this.

A long time ago, in the distant past, well ok, about 12 months ago I suggested in this blog that if you’ve got an ailment that goes on for any length of time then it’s probably a good idea to get yourself off to see your doctor before it’s too late. This stemmed from me ignoring the “Bleeding Obvious” for far too long when my voice was knackered.

Back in September Anna and I met with an old friend whilst out for lunch before she disappeared back to Lincoln for her final year at University. We both noticed that his voice was somewhat croaky and weak compared to normal. I asked him what was up and he explained that he’d been having problems with his voice for a few months………………… The alarm bells rang immediately with me as it was exactly the same symptoms I’d managed to ignore. We chatted for a while and I went through my treatment with him, without trying to scare him too much, but just enough for him to go and see his doctor. By the time we’d finished lunch he’d been on the phone to his surgery and appointment had been booked.

Over the next couple of months we kept in touch, mainly with his son via FB. It transpired that as soon as he saw his doctor he was placed on the 14 day pathway and thus began the web. He’s 25 years older than me and built like a whippet, not a spare ounce of fat on him at all. 20 sessions of Radiotherapy were his reward for seeing the quack and like everyone who undergoes that treatment is was tough for him and his supportive family.

On Tuesday of this week we were out in the evening an bumped into the son, we had a long chat about life, the universe and his old man. I was gobsmacked when he said that his father is now in remission following his treatment at RBH, brilliant news! He’s still knackered, but determined to be back working as soon as he can, albeit at a slower pace we all hope.

This just goes to show what amazing treatment you can receive on the NHS if you get seen early enough to allow them to treat you properly.

It appears to be the time for friends to be ill, as well as my old friend there are two other people who were great support to me when I was ill. So Eek and Gordon, kick it into touch please guys.

To end this little piece I thought it would be a good idea to add a little humour. There are loads of daily blogs on Facebook, but by far the funniest I’ve read is Peter and Jane  the subline is “Peter & Jane have exciting adventures with Mummy. Mummy likes gin. Peter & Jane like starting fires, trying to kill each other and driving Mummy to drink” this doesn’t tell half the story, I’d urge you to read a few of the blogs to get a taste of the brilliant writing and observations. You’ll grow to love Judgy Dog, Gadget Twat and the other regular characters. However don’t just read the blog, read some of the comments too, they can be side splittingly funny. I occasionally post comments, usually featuring “The Current Mrs C.” I’d mentioned the fact that I also write an occasional blog, the next day it had over 1,000 views, the highest daily hit rate since I started writing! None of the tight fisted “Yummy Mummies” bought the book though - #Shoulder2Shoulder

As always, thanks for reading.

#Shoulder2Shoulder. 

New Years Update – Reasons to be Cheerful

Ok, I lied when I said my next blog update would be when the next book is published, I couldn’t keep my public waiting that long. Truth be told, I’ve hit writers block a bit over the last few weeks, so I thought I’d try to get the juices flowing via a blog.

Firstly I managed to survive the Boxing Day match at OBR, my 5 minute cameo turned into to closer to 20 minutes, but I got away undamaged, largely due to being far too slow and unfit to be anywhere near the action. The closest I got to the ball was when the Oppo’s flyhalf, Nick Flynn, noticed that he was running between John Raspin (Prop) and me………. The smile on his face when he sprinted through the gap we’d created needed to be seen. Overall a cracking morning, with three sets of “Lads ‘n Dads” and one set of three brothers on the pitch. It was also pleasing that the Junior’s (who Max and I played for) totally stuffed the Mini’s  24-22. 

NYE will be spent with the same friends that we’ve spent to last 15 years with, our turn to host this year. Shopping at Sainsbury’s at 7am in the morning for the ingredients for the lasagne proved to be an interesting experience, more staff than customers. Anna is off celebrating the New Year in Lanzarote (Subject to SleazyJet), Max and current squeeze are off at some house party.

On Thursday 29^th December Radio 5 Live ran a phone-in, the subject of which was “Reason’s to be cheerful”. I’m guessing this was in response to all the celebrity deaths and other shoite news that had come out towards the end of the year. The callers came up with some pretty darn good reasons to still have a smile on their faces. I sent a text into the show which read “On December 24^th 2015 I was diagnosed with throat cancer, in May 2016 I was told I was in remission. The staff at Royal Berkshire Hospital, my family and my friends have given me a massive reason to be cheerful at the end of 2016.” About 10 minutes after I’d sent the text my phone rang, it was a researcher from the BBC asking if I’d be prepared to talk to the host of the show. I declined as my voice wasn’t behaving itself and I still get quite emotional when I talk about the treatment, I was also supposed to be working.

Later in the day I got thinking about what really had made me happy in the year, the list was getting endless. Then I gave up on my thoughts and chucked it out to the wider audience of Facebook. I asked the simple question, “What has made you happy in 2016?”

Ian Dury

Here are some of the answers:

Ladies rugby team being formed and the friendships that have also been formed.

Parents travelling after illness.

Student’s rugby match, bringing players together again.

Dogs and the companionship they bring.

Travelling.

New adventures.

Being sober.

New arrivals.

Spray Tans looking better than expected! (The undoubted winner!) 

Surviving not being shot. (Tony Slater, most of us had money on you being shot in the USA!).

New Jobs

New friends

New challenges

The three reasons that came up time and time again were, family, health and friends.

So, to say goodbye to 2016, raise a glass to family, health and friends.

Happy New Year one 'n all, thank you for reading my words over the last 12 months and the support we’ve received.

Now to get drunk!

#Shoulder2Shoulder

PS – No pressure 2017, but I’d be quite pleased if you weren’t quite as crap as 2016, ta muchly. 

Happy Christmas

#shoulder2shoulder – 

The Christmas Album

It’s Christmas Time, there’s no need to be afraid….. Bob Geldof wrote the words 32 years ago. Last Christmas, I’m not embarrassed to say, I was afraid. Now I’m pretty sanguine about what life has thrown at me and what is still to come. It’s now nearly 12 months since I started writing this blog, it seems like five minutes ago sometimes, and five years ago at others. There’s now been over 10,000 hits, for that I’m really appreciative. What started as a way of putting my feelings into words seems to have escalated a bit. A book later and the blog is still alive ‘n kicking, as am I. In a perverse way I don’t think I would change anything about the last 12 months, well perhaps a couple fewer episodes on constipation, but on the whole I think I’ve come out of the process a stronger person. I’ve certainly learnt a lot about myself, my family and my friends. I’ve also learnt never to use “&” in formal writing, thanks Marjie!

There’s not really a lot to say following my last posting at the beginning of November. I’ve had two more monthly meetings at the hospital which have been routine. Cards and chocolates were dropped off at my appointment last Thursday. It was exactly one year since I was diagnosed. I thought Scary might have remembered our anniversary, sadly not until I reminder her. We did however have a good chat about “Things in general” and she asked if I was going to be updating this blog again……….. opp’s appears she’s been reading it.

I’ve had a couple of Christmas parties via work, the first time for a couple of years for one reason or another, including a cracking afternoon at Ronnie Scott’s in London. Rams are looking good in the league, the games at OBR are some of the most entertaining I’ve seen for a few seasons. I’ve made the donations to MacMillan and the Berkshire Cancer Trust from the sale of my book, each will benefit just shy of £500, so not too shabby an effort. Another icon has died from cancer, one of the better Christmas songs I hope you’ll agree - Greg Lake

Anna is smashing her last year at Uni, albeit by working her backside off. Max will get the grades he needs in his exams in the summer. Carol is a year closer to hanging up her boots as a nurse (It’ll be the NHS’s loss) and I’m plodding along trying to work out what happens next………..

This post is really just to say thank you to everyone who’s given the Clark family support, near or far this year and we hope you have a great Christmas with your families and friends.  

If you’re short of something to do on Boxing Day, as promised last Christmas, I’ll be making a guest appearance on the pitch at OBR with Max. Supporters, amused bystanders, folk laughing their pants off will all be welcome. Kick off is sometime around 11am, or when 30 guys eventually turn up.

As always, thanks for reading. I’ve no idea when the next update will appear, but suspect it won’t be until the next book is ready to be published.

#Shoulder2Shoulder 

The Last Post

TO THE MEMORY OF THE FALLEN AND THE FUTURE OF THE LIVING

Thursday 3^rd November.

I can’t believe that it’s been 10 months since I started writing this blog, a fair amount of water has passed under the bridge in that time. Nearly 10,000 hits, and a massive amount of support from the cyber world. This time last year I felt like I was a fairly young 53 year old, today I feel like a pretty old 54 year old. 

It’s now time to put the blog to bed for a while, I know I said a few months ago, but I now need to concentrate on other things and really start to get on with my new life, post cancer.

I’m about 7,000 words into my next book, this one is more “Faction” than #ShouldertoShoulder and I aim to have it finished sometime in early 2017, there’s no real time pressure, but I want to eradicate the errors I made in #S2S. I’m aiming for at least 150,000 words for this book, that’ll be somewhere in the region of 250 pages. #S2S has stopped selling now at 130 copies, but only 21 reviews, so again, if you’ve read it, please stick up a review. It could push further sales which will increase the donations to Macmillan and Berkshire Cancer Centre.

Last week I had my usual monthly visit to the ENT Dept for a check up. I saw both Scary and Jo for a change. As usual the appointment was running late, and equally as usual when I sat down with the terrible twosome I was able to talk freely and without any time constraints. I’ve been losing a fair amount of weight since the summer, I’m down to just over 74kg at the time of writing. Scary is of the opinion that my body is having a reaction to the course of treatment it was subjected to and that time will be the ultimate healer. Eating had again become a real challenge. I get halfway through a meal and just don’t want anymore. Carol has managed to get hold of a pile of Enshake drinks which were about to go out of date so can’t be used at the hospital. I’m having two or three of these a day, as well as trying to eat normally, but the weight won’t go back on for some reason. Jo spent a good half hour with me after Scary had done her camera job on my throat. It really was a case of back to basics with her, I felt almost as if I was back to March this year when I felt so ill. She advised that I’ve got to stop bottling things up and to talk to people, be it family, friends or professionals. I’m very conscious that over the past 10 months or so it’s been all about me and the illness and that people must now be getting sick and tired of it. Change the record Clarky.

Carol and I finished off the month with a long weekend in Amsterdam, a city we visited quite regularly when I worked for a Dutch banking group. We hadn’t been for about 14 years, but nothing much has changed really, other than it was incredibly busy and the streets seemed strewn with rubbish from overflowing litter bins well into the late morning. The Red Light district appeared to be even more seedy that I recall it being in the past, but we didn’t exactly spend long there so no worries. Carol wasn’t too keen on trying to pay her way on the trip #Stalker

 

I was a bit disappointed with the Rijksmuseum, which I found to be little more than a massive art gallery and not what I’d call a museum in the true sense of the word, mind you I’m not exactly a culture vulture at the best of times. Amsterdam is a city that can easily be walked around, and walk we did! I think we probably covered a good 10k on each of our three days there.

As mentioned in a previous blog, the food in Holland, if you stick to Dutch food, can be a bit “strange” however there’s an abundance of Argentinian steak houses spread around the city. One, called, Argentinos was where we used to eat when we visited in the past. It was a real joy to see the restaurant is still standing and serving great steaks and wonderful Malbec, it’s wasn’t quite so great when they didn’t recognise us after a gap of a mere 14 years! I’m an avid poster to TripAdvisor when we’ve been away or on trips, but it’s rare for me to give a 1* review. However Destra del Ponte was lucky to even get the 1*. A truly awful place, with the worst service and food I’ve had the misfortune to be on the receiving end of for a long time. If you’re planning a trip to the Dam, read the reviews first.

Overall it was a great few day, the weather was kind to us, it’s just a short hop on a plane and the whole city speaks English. This was our forth holiday since Corfu in June, and will be the last one of 2016. I get the feeling that Carol is already making plans for 2017.

Yesterday saw me rocking up to RBH at 7.30am for hopefully the last procedure I’ll have to undergo for a few years. It was the day of the magic balloon trick to expand my throat and enable me to eat properly again and gain some much needed weight. Mr More Scary than Scary was performing the operation. I hadn’t really warmed to him in the past, however on the day he seemed almost human and certainly put my mind at ease. It turns out he’s a rugby fan, so me turning up in my Rams Hoodie and tracksuit bottoms probably broke the ice a bit. The risks were minimal, but pretty nasty if they occurred. The upside would be massive, if it comes off. I next met the Anaesthetist who had been in charge of me for my last Biopsy back in July. He came up with a bit of a “Left Field” idea for knocking me out. Those of you with long memories may recall my slight problem I had with dying when being put under in December. Well his idea was to use the exact same anaesthetic and see if I was actually allergic to it, or if I’d just had a bad reaction…………….. Well I’m game for most things at this point of my life so I agreed to go for it. The fact that I’m writing this blog seems to prove his “Bad reaction” theory. I woke up a couple of hours later, the procedure appeared to have gone well, there were no new nasties to see whilst they were down there. The balloon was inflated, my throat was expanded and a day later it still feels like I’ve been gargling razor blades! I’ve been advised to rest up and take it easy over the weekend, so I’ll take them at their word for it. The nurse who was looking after me in the Recovery Suite seemed to take a great interest in the treatment I’ve been through to date and asked lots of pretty pertinent questions, including how I was trying to manage my weight loss. Her advice, which I’ll follow, is to only weigh myself  once a week, not daily like I’ve been doing for months. That was it gives any swings or roundabouts the chance to settle down. Her name was Junita, she’s Spanish, she works for the NHS and I’m pleased she does. I’ll be seeing Mr More Scary than Scary in about four weeks to see how the throat has settled down and to plan the next stage of recovery. I’ll also be seeing Scary in about three weeks, I’m hoping she’ll stick me onto quarterly reviews at that point.

I’m a bit of a “Bah Humbug” when it comes to Christmas, if I had my way the decorations would go up on 23^rd December and come back down on 27^th. However, the kids have reminded me that the last two years have been pretty crap for us over the holiday period. Two years ago I spent Christmas night on a ward in RBH after having developed a rather nasty infection. Of course last year it was getting the news that it was cancer on Christmas Eve that put a bit of a downer on the celebrations. Even though we had a cracking day with Evil Twin and Stuart, there was an undercurrent throughout the day. So this year, they’ve asked, if I wouldn’t mind, if we could have a drama free Christmas. Is it chancing my arm playing a two minute cameo in the annual match up at OBR on Boxing Day? 

The past 10 months have given a lot of lows and a fair few highs.

Firstly the lows. My mum died and I didn’t get around to saying goodbye. I feel really old. Constipation is a real pain in the ass! I contracted cancer. March was really, really, really, really BAD!!! I’ve cried more often in the last 10 months than in the last 30 years. Crying through pain, frustration, confusion, exhaustion, and no damn reason at all.

Now the highs. I’ve learnt that my family and friends are second to none. Carol and I have had four holidays since June, and we’re still talking to each other. Rams stayed up in National 2 for another season. I got to see Max play adult rugby. Anna has managed to get a job she wants before she graduates. The NHS is bloody wonderful. I’ve published a book. I’m still alive. Crying is actually quite good for you. I’ve cried tears of joy, laughter, relief, through acts of random kindness, and for no damn reason at all, because I can.

That’s it, there’s not really anything else to say now.

As always, thanks for reading this blog, I really appreciate the feedback I’ve received over the months of writing.

#ShouldertoShoulder

The End